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The Day After Mother’s Day

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Shulanda J. Hastings

Ambassador Shulanda

Ambassador Shulanda

Shulanda J. Hastings is an inspirational writer, Christian counselor and an ambassador to the faith-based community; helping them break mental health barriers. She is the author of the Beauty of My Thorns novel series and of the memoirs, Keeping My Faith While Saving My Mind.

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Many holidays are overrated, but…

Mother’s Day is not one of them.  In fact, I would argue that it is not valued to the extent it is marketed.

Sure, every store is selling a product to remind you at least three weeks in advance that the day set aside to recognize all mothers is vastly approaching.

Yes, there are many secular and spiritual events planned to honor past, current and soon to be mothers. So of course, this day is greatly appreciated and respected, right?

May I ask you to think about something?

What if someone gave you a check for a million dollars and you did everything in one day to show how much you valued the donation?

In one day, you held a press conference announcing and receiving the check.  In one day, you did interviews explaining the impact the value of the check would have in your life and perhaps your organization. In one day, you had the display check framed and celebrated with family and friends going on and on about how the check will be such a blessing to you.

Then, the day after you received the check you forgot to do important things:

You forgot to thank the person who gave you the check…

You forgot to follow up about the plans you made for spending the check…

You forgot to even deposit the real check!

This simple analogy describes how many of us treat Mother’s Day.  We get caught up in celebrating a day and forget to celebrate the reality of the occasion or its significance. Unfortunately, it is those whose mothers are no longer living that truly understand the value of Mother’s Day.

But for the rest of us, do we really value our mothers?  Do we really appreciate the value of being able to pick up a phone just to say hello or jump in our cars or board a plane to visit our mothers any time?

Were we just caught up in the moment when we made plans to work on broken relationships or do we really plan to follow up with those promises today, tomorrow and the days after?

Did we temporarily forgive on Mother’s Day and today we are refilled with bitterness?

This morning I woke up still basking over the fact that four generations got to spend Mother’s Day together:  myself, my daughter, my mother and my grandmother. Before I could kiss my little toddler, there was a breaking news report of two separate incidents where a mother tried to stab her daughter and a daughter attacked her mother.

Why?  Was the first question I had.  Especially after such a commemorative day.

The answer could be many in their situations, but it still boils down to this:  celebrating a holiday and not valuing the significance.

Life is not about celebrating certain days on a calendar. These days help to remind us to take special time to remember memories.  But you can’t celebrate what you don’t already value or appreciate.  Relationships are invaluable.  They take work.  They take time. They are rewarding. All of these things come with what we do after Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, birthdays and so forth.

It is not guaranteed that we will have years or even days after one-day celebrations in order to make new memories. Therefore, we must cherish every day and seize every moment that we have.

I challenge you to make memories with those you love. Offer true forgiveness. Sacrifice time.  Because you never really know when you had your last day to do these precious things until the day after. How will you really honor your mother the day after?


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